Category Archives: love your life

SerenDestiny #74: Did You Listen to the Believers or Nay-sayers? Did You Act on Your Talent – or Set It Aside

photo of lebron

“I am who I am because you believed in me.” – Ulysses S. Grant

In this fascinating article in USA Today, journalist Jeff Zillgitt reports that several Hall of Fame players from the NBA (i.e., Bill Russell, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar) share their opinion that Lebron James is a player they admire and appreciate.

In fact, Russell said, “What I think about him is what I used to tell Wilt Chamberlain. I told him, ‘I think I’m the only guy on the planet who really knows how good you are because I’ve seen you up close.'”

You may know that Lebron was on the cover of Sports Illustrated with the headline The Chosen Onewhen he was a junior in high school.

Here are just a few of his other impressive stats:
* 9 time All-Star
* Player of the Week 43 times
* 1st player to average 26 points, 8 rebounds, 7 assists and shoot 56% from the field

Lebron James

So, what’s the point?

Well, first, congrats to Lebron.

Second, I love it when peers speak up about their respect for a colleague’s talent.

You know what I’ve discovered about many SerenDestineers?

Early in their life, they were fortunate to have people point out their talent.

Sometimes it was a teacher. Sometimes a coach. Someone who was close and SAW their talent. Someone who believed in them and took the time to say, “You’re good at this. You ought to pursue it.”

And these budding SerenDestineers listened.

They took this favorable feedback to heart and owned and acted on their talent.

They put in the hard work. They developed that talent and turned it into a pro-passion (half profession-half passion) where they now get paid to do what they love most and do best.

How about you?

Did you have a skill growing up you were good at? A talent that put the light on in your eyes?

Were you lucky enough to have believers around you who pointed it out and complimented you on it?

Did you take that feedback to heart? Did you own and act on your talent?

If so, has it led to you being in a state of SerenDestiny where you’re getting paid to do what puts the light on in your eyes?

Or, did the significant others in your life tell you, “That’s a nice hobby, but you’ll never make a living at it.”

Did they say, “I know you like to act, play ball, sing, dance, draw, (or whatever); but you’re not good enough to make the pro’s, play for the college team, make it in on Broadway, turn it into a career.”

Did you listen to those nay-sayers? Did you let someone steal your dream? Did you let those skeptics talk you out of pursuing what you loved to do?

Maybe they thought they were looking out for you. Maybe they genuinely thought they had your best interests at heart.

Regardless of their intentions, abandoning what you’re good at, putting aside a talent that once lit you up, can end in regrets. You may be filled with “What if’s?”

So, how old are you?

Are you still young, still trying to decide what you want to do with the rest of your life?

Are you mid-career and there’s still time to consider transitioning into work that could be more meaningful, that would give you an opportunity to use those latent talents?

Are you towards the end of your career and thinking about retirement?

Whatever stage of life-work you’re at; ask yourself the following questions.

1. What skill or talent did I have growing up? What lit me up?

2. What is something I was good at that people admired or complimented me on?

3. Am I still actively involved in that?

4. If so, is it rewarding? Does it bring me joy? Does it feel good to do what I’m good at?

5 If no, do I miss it? Would I like to get involved in that again? Is that feasible?

6. If I would like to bring that talent or skill back into my life, how am I going to do it? Who can I contact; what is one step I can take to get involved in what lights me up … this month?

I know you’re busy, and I’d love to hear your feedback about this.

Did you listen to the believers or the nay-sayers? Did you act on your talent – or put it aside?

Please take a few minutes to share your story. I’m eager to hear it, and I know others will benefit from hearing your experience … the good, the bad, the “I wish I had …”

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SerenDestiny #46: Are You Living the Life You’re Born to Live? Take This Quiz to Find Out

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“If you are working on something exciting you really care about, you don’t have to be pushed. The vision pulls you.” – Steve Jobs One of the great joys of my life is interviewing SerenDestineers who are getting paid to … Continue reading

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SerenDestiny #45: How Does Giving AND Receiving Set Your SerenDestiny in Motion?

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“You can give without loving; but you cannot love without giving.” – Amy Carmichael You’ve heard it’s better to give than receive? I don’t think it’s an either/or – I think it’s both. I think it’s better to give AND … Continue reading

SerenDestiny #43: Hunches are Your Calling . . . Calling

“Trust your hunches. They’re usually based on facts filed away just below the conscious level.” – Dr. Joyce Brothers

Have you ever had an inkling to walk down this street, register for that event, reach out to this person; and it resulted in connecting you with someone or something that moved your life forward – for good?

Think about it. What are hunches? Where do they come from?

Some people call hunches “intuition.” Others call them a “gut instinct or gut feelings.” Creative people may call them their “muse.” Religious people sometimes call them divine intervention or “God Winks.” Some call them “premonition” or a “sixth sense.”

I’ve learned many things about hunches while interviewing people for my upcoming SerenDestiny book including:

a. Whatever you call hunches, they’re almost always right.
b. Hunches happen for a reason. A good reason.
c. Acting on hunches often results in a “stroke of luck,” good fortune, a blessing, a fortuitous twist of fate, what some people call “kismet.”

People from around the world have told me dramatic stories of how honoring a hunch set their SerenDestiny in motion.

The problem is, many of us don’t value hunches. We get an internal nudge to do this, go there, but we dismiss it with “I don’t feel like it. I don’t have time. That’s crazy. I’ll do it later.” And later is too late.

I remember a fascinating TV interview of Gavin de Becker, author of The Gift of Fear and a high-profile security consultant.

He said, “I ask people who have been assaulted if there were any warning signs beforehand. Many tell me they couldn’t put their finger on it, but they knew something was . . . wrong. The hairs on the backs of their arms stood up; their heart started pounding; something.

‘When I ask them, ‘Why didn’t you run or call for help?’ they often say they looked around and couldn’t see anything suspicious. Since they couldn’t see any evidence to justify their alarm, they dismissed it. They shrugged off their fears instead of realizing their body went on alert for a reason and they should take steps to protect themselves.”

What’s the point?

Our body gives us signs when it senses dissonance. Our instincts sense when something’s about to go wrong.

I’ve come to believe our body also give us signs when it senses resonance Our instincts sense when something’s about to go right.

I call those warning signs “hostile hunches.”

I call those resonant signs “harmonic hunches.”

Just as our instincts alert us to a coalescing of hostile circumstances, they also alert us to a coalescing of harmonic circumstances.

Survival hunches alerting us to dangerous circumstances prepare us for fight or flight.

Serendestiny hunches alerting us to desirable circumstances prepare us for a favorable future.

Acting on “hostile” hunches can keep us safe.

Acting on “harmonic” hunches can jump-start our fate.

One of the goals of this SerenDestiny blog and my upcoming book are to convince you of the miracles that await you if you honor your hostile and harmonic hunches.

Hostile hunches can alert you to toxic people and situations that will pull you off path.

Harmonic hunches alert you to compatible individuals and situations that can become stepping stones to a life where the light’s on in your eyes.

What’s non-negotiable is that you don’t dismiss hunches as “silly” or “trivial.”

I’ll say it again. Whatever hunches are; they’re rarely wrong.

If your gut is screaming at you to get away from a certain person or situation – even if there’s no “evidence” for your distrust or distaste – accept that it’s in your best interests to head the other direction. Toxic individuals and situations block your SerenDestiny because conflict consumes energy.

If a certain person or situation strikes a chord with you, if they’ve got a good “vibe,” seek them out. Even if you can’t put your finger on it, but an opportunity “feels right,” pursue that compatible connection in the moment.

One of the most important things I’ve learned in my years of researching SerenDestiny is the importance of capitalizing on a confluence of fortuitous factors. This “conFLOWence” is dynamic, it’s fleeting. For whatever reason, a providential combination of events has crystallized and come together NOW.

If you don’t capitalize on it immediately, that particular set of circumstances shifts and that window of opportunity . . . closes, perhaps forever.

Who knows if those agianst-all-odds fortuitous factors will re-align again?

I’m not trying to be melodramatic. It’s just that, as Graham Greene said, “There is a moment in every child’s life when the door opens and lets the future in.”

There are moments in everyone’s life when a door opens and lets their future in.

It’s up to us to be alert to those moments and take advantage of them. By definition, they only exist for a brief time.

From now on, understand that hunches are SerenDestiny Stepping Stones appearing before you are gifts from the universe. They are pointing out a harmonic path that will align you with like-minded individuals and opportunities. All you have to do is step forward in faith.

This isn’t woo-woo. Thousands of individuals have vouched for the “you wouldn’t believe it if it weren’t true” benefits they’ve reaped as a result of honoring their intuitive nudges.

Next time you get a hunch, even if you’re tired or busy; even if you don’t know where it’s going; follow its lead. Something or someone delightful awaits you.

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SerenDestiny® #40: How Glee Star Jane Lynch is Living Her SerenDestiny®

“I said yes to everything, even when I thought I should be over there or over here, and I ended up getting a better life than I ever imagined for myself.” – Jane Lynch Jane Lynch is on a roll. … Continue reading